In Sickness And In Health

The first wealth is health — Ralph Waldo Emerson

Many people downplay this quote when they are healthy and can worry about things like paying their bills on time, improving their financial status and net worth, spending time with their family and other activities they engage in to keep up with the Joneses until they fall sick. Then they start thinking about their health.

A healthy man wants a thousand things, a sick man only wants one — Confucius

It’s like having a blocked/stuffy nose. When it’s there, you miss the times you breathed easily without noticing. You took it for granted. All you want is to breathe freely again.

But when it’s gone, you forget about it. You slip back into the habits that caused it in the first place. Good health is sorta like that. It is the foundation on which all other life pleasures are built and sex is no exception.

Without good health, there is no way you’re going to enjoy having sex with your partner. Heck! without good health, you may not even be able to have sex talkless of actually enjoying the act.

As important as health is, I’m baffled at how many people don’t think it’s important when it comes to their sexual satisfaction with their romantic partners.

Like Warren Buffet said,

We only get one body and one mind for the rest of our lives and it is up to us to treat it with the utmost care, honour and respect

P.S. That was me paraphrasing by the way. He did not say it like that but you get the point I’m trying to make.

I purposely saved this last core contributing factor for last because it’s always the last thing people think of when they think of the things that cause sexual incompatibility between them and their romantic partner.

Let’s end this and a bang shall we?…

MY THOUGHTS 🧠

Again, we use the root cause technique by asking questions and answering them until we find our answer.

Question: Why do physical health issues contribute to sexual incompatibility?
Answer: Because they can lead to a lack of sexual desire, physical discomfort and limitations in sexual activity.

Question: Why do physical health issues cause a lack of sexual desire, physical discomfort and limitations in sexual activity?
Answer: Because some conditions, like chronic pain, obesity, or disability, can make certain sexual positions or activities difficult or painful thereby making it difficult to engage in sexual activities.

Question: Why do some individuals experience chronic pain, obesity, or disability?
Answer: Chronic pain may be caused by injuries or medical conditions. Obesity can result from poor diet and lack of exercise. Disability may be the result of accidents or “congenital conditions”.

P.S.: Congenital conditions are health issues present at birth. They can be caused by genetics or factors during fetal development. These conditions affect various body parts and can range from mild to severe.

Question: Why do individuals experience injuries, poor diet, lack of exercise, accidents, or congenital conditions?
Answer: Injuries may result from accidents, poor diet, and lack of exercise can be linked to lifestyle choices, and accidents and congenital conditions are often beyond one’s control.

Question: Why do people make poor lifestyle choices, and why do accidents and congenital conditions occur?
Answer: People make poor lifestyle choices due to a lack of education, stress, and other factors. Accidents can happen due to various circumstances, and congenital conditions are genetic or developmental.

In summary, the main reason for physical health issues causing problems in romantic and married couples’ sex lives is a mix of genetic factors — beyond their control, lifestyle choices — which are totally in their control, and environmental influences such as education, culture, and access to quality healthcare.

So…what now?

Well, this is what I’d do with this information if I had this pain point/issue…

THE GAMEPLAN 🎯

Step 1: Understand Your Health
You and your romantic partner should take a moment to understand your unique physical health. Recognize any concerns or conditions you’re both dealing with, like diabetes, heart issues, or chronic pain. Learn how these health issues have influenced your sexual intimacy by compromising your compatibility with each other.

Step 2: Embrace a Healthier Lifestyle
Start by making small, practical changes in your diet. Opt for fresh, whole foods and limit processed items and junk food. This not only improves your health but also your energy levels and desire.
Also, engage in light activities like daily walks together or trying out some couples’ yoga. As your strength builds, increase the intensity and frequency.

Step 3: Seek Professional Guidance
Schedule a visit to your doctor to address your health concerns and follow their advice.
If emotional issues surface as a result of sexual frustration, therapy from a trained relationship coach or counsellor can help. NEVER hesitate to reach out to specialists.

Step 4: Communicate and Mutual Support Each Other
Create a space where you and your romantic partner can talk openly about your desires, frustrations and sexual challenges. Share your health journey, including the highs and lows, with them.
As you both embrace a healthier lifestyle, encourage and support each other’s efforts. Share activities that promote each others’ well-being.

Step 5: Adapt and Experiment With Your Partner
Be open to trying new things to maintain intimacy and pleasure. If certain activities are physically challenging, find alternatives.
If necessary, consult sexual health experts and sex coaches who can offer guidance on enhancing your intimacy despite physical health challenges.

Step 6: Have Regular Check-Ins and Continuous Improvement
Keep up with regular health check-ups. This ensures you can tackle any emerging health concerns effectively.
Also, as your health and relationship evolve with your romantic partner, adapt your strategies. Prioritize not only your physical well-being but also your emotional connection and overall intimacy.

Step 7:Seek Support Networks
Look for local or online support groups for couples facing similar physical health challenges and intimacy issues. Connecting with others can provide a strong support system.

Step 8: Celebrate Your Progress
Celebrate every achievement, big or small. Your joint efforts deserve recognition. Keep the positivity flowing in your relationship.